STRIKE FOR INTERTUBE RIGHTS

This blog is also on strike. Indefinitely. Unless Obama vetoes some bullshits. In which case we will happily un-strike and your life will be meaningful again.

okay maybe France doesn't make EVERYTHING more awesome

So... this video is terrible (see everythingisterrible.com for more), and thus not everything that comes from France is awesome. Which is good to keep in mind, but some things that come from France are undeniably awesome. Wine. Cheese. Yelle. Oh, and did I mention that Yelle is coming to BALTIMORE (the most awesome city in the Mid-Atlantic region) to do a show? She is, and it's on Wednesday.

PS. Okay fine, her shit's just as weird and ridiculous as everything else that comes from France. But maybe that's secretly why I like it.
YELLE - Comme Un Enfant (official music video) from Yelle on Vimeo.

OKAY I GUESS I WILL

3:29 PM DJ FUCKING PRETENTIOUS: POST

ON

THE

BLOG

me: i'm not posting on the blog

3:30 PM DJ FUCKING PRETENTIOUS: blog improves quality of life

me: i'll get around to it eventually

you're probably right

but enthusiasm to do anything right now is kind of non-existent

3:31 PM DJ FUCKING PRETENTIOUS: i'm gonna give you some homework

watch this video

and say whatever the fuck you want about it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KX5xh4AX2HU&feature=player_embedded

me: ok

3:33 PM DJ FUCKING PRETENTIOUS: it involves tots

me: well i do like those

my review, as requested: this video makes me uncomfortable in ways i'm not entirely sure how to express. i didn't even make it all the way through. it just seemed... wrong. the auto-tuning? the doberman bra hanger? the refrigerator hand job? i don't know. i don't want to know. I'M DONE, LET'S GO HOME

Belated Album Review: Valerie and Friends

So basically there's only one reason that I'm reviewing this album. It's not that I want to trash it, although there's plenty of albums in existence that I should probably review on here so that I can trash them. But no, the reason I'm reviewing Valerie and Friends is that I can't believe it took me so long to find this album when it describes all that is in my soul. Their crunchy basslines, gentle filters, and airy synths feel like a vision of what electronic dance music would be playing if you walked into a space station's nightclub. Oh, how I want to live on that space station right now.


This is the only link I could find to the compilation, but you can find it on Spotify or iTunes.

NEW ORBITAL

That's right, ORBITAL.

I KNOW, RIGHT! It's been forever. So long. I can remember being in my dorm room in high school and having my alarm set to - you guessed it. Halcyon and on and on.



So I'm obviously psyched for this news: Orbital is releasing a full-length album in 2012!!!

And from what I've heard of this track it's going to be awesome.


Never by ORBITAL

From the UK duo themselves:

“[The album is] a kaleidoscope of everything we like about electronic music. But the biggest influence on this album has been two years of playing live, listening to old Orbital music. We wanted to make music that we would like to play live. It had to flow and ebb like a live set.”

Mighty awesome way to end October

October's not gone yet, but Mighty Mouse has already given us something to look forward to in November. It's not Thanksgiving, the earlier sunsets, the crunchy leaves or the frosty weather. Rather it's the drop of the bass, the buildup of another disco track, and the seductive vocal tracks featured in his November mixtape. It's the feel of cold night air after burning it up in the club.

Mighty Mouse November 2011 Mixtape by Mighty Mouse

Parties and a Scooter

This is mostly to distract you from the video below, which you SHOULD NOT WATCH. CROTCHFACES, OK? DO YOU LIKE THOSE? NO, YOU DON'T.

But I guess it's also about some awesome things coming up:

1) Old news - Dancetoberfest was totally rad. Firedancers were TOTALLY AWESOME. Wine and cider were AWESOME, sound system was... uncooperative but the DJ's were AWESOME. Also, if you enjoy listening to repeated requests for "Stepping Razor", we had those too.

2) Halloween is coming up, which should be awesome. Playing at THE PALACE with the awesome guys from AWESOME PHYSICAL POWER. This is pretty much what it's going to be like (via Kid RB): 

3) I Just got a scooter. It's like the coolest thing around. Consequently I have christened it with a scooter mix, which I made last night. Well, more accurately I made a mix last night and couldn't think of what to call it, so it's the Scooter Mix now. The Scooter Mix by THE SHITSHOW

DON'T

watch this, ever. you like sleeping, right?



they should show this in high school sex ed classes, probably. instant birth control. i know i never want anything to do with this again.

Way more moneys

Once again I am a slave to the tracks.
\\

Disco Release Roundup

Lots of good stuff out from my favoritest disco artists and labels. Let's see if I can overload this blorg with the embeds. La Zebra - After School Special ep by La Valigetta Quinten 909 & Mayhem - Work It Out (Original Mix) by Quinten 909 Do It Again by Cherokee (Official) SDR-014 Kosmetique - III EP by Stardust Records Shiny Disco Club - Millenium Disco Vol.2 (SDCR 007) by Shiny Disco Club

PS SPECIAL TREAT HERE

WHY DONT I LIVE IN PARIS EPISODE #987432

Seriously, someone in Paris, give me a job. I need to brush on the Paris-speak so that I may find such a job and join in the fray.

Your mission

Dear Internet,
I can't go to this, so you're going to have to go to it in my stead. Let me know how it is, because I like both those DJs a lot.

Thanks,
DJ FUCKING PRETENTIOUS

PS. Thanks to all the awesome DJs, fire-hoopers, and attendees of our most successful dancetoberfest yet! You rule!

SNOOP DOGGSTEP

This is kind of a neat thing. It's not too obnoxiously dubsteppy. It's definitely there, but it's no "Bass Cannon." This is a good time to mention that DJs apparently take that song seriously and play it all the time. It's a little terrifying and immediately drops all cred I've got for that particular turntable artiste. BASS CANNON BASS CANNON BASS CANNON BASS CANNON remember that one time I posted it?.

Moving along, here's a song from the tape:
Snoop Dogg - Be Like Me (Remix ft. P Money, Double E, Professor Green) by fuckyesmusic

Anyway go download the rest of it:
http://www.speakerboxworld.com/throwyourdubsup/

[EDIT: Turns out this mixtape actually samples "Bass Cannon." Sorry, yo.]

OH MY GOD WHAT DID I JUST WATCH BUT THE SOUNDTRACK IS GOOD LISTEN TO IT

I saw Drive over the weekend. I didn't particularly know what to expect, other than that the critics loved it and the plot seemed fun and compelling (a stunt driver who moonlights as a getaway driver). Oh boy. That was NOT what I got. Think european art house plus horrifying 70s/80s film gore. The first half is amazing and understated and filled with pregnant silences that communicate far more than actual dialogue. Amazing cinematography. It was very good. Then. THEN. Do you enjoy forks to eyeballs? Hammers to hands? Close-range shotgun murders? Razors to necks? And my favorite, graphic head stomping?

Let's just go ahead and talk about the skull crushing so you can experience the magic with me! I have never felt so nauseated in my life. They don't show it. But you hear it. Onomatopoeia time! CRACK crack CRUNCH crunch crunch SMUSH smush smlursh SPLASH splash splash... You get the picture. It was the best.

Why am I talking about this wonderful/awful movie? The soundtrack. Fantastic! Really very good! It's French electro-house and it almost kept me from retching.

Desire- Under Your Spell by thorstein

Kavinsky - Nightcall by lordpiyo

Download the rest of it now. There is even a track called "Skull Crushing," where you can go ahead and keep imagining that scene with me. Have fun!

flyer makes it official

200 POSTS

You guys, we've made 200 posts! Craziness! Why? Nobody reads this! But! We have 5500 page views since we started blorging! It's probably just DJFP and I constantly hitting F5 to re-read our posts. Because, you know, we want to ensure quality. This is a quality blog. It didn't use to be, but it is. Quality!

WHAT A JOURNEY

Here's some music, which you might like! I don't know. Keep reading! More pageviews! Thx 4 ur support.
Kanye West, Jay-Z - OTIS (DJ Rockid's Frantic BOOTLEG) by djrockid

Turning my labor into money into tracks into party funtimes for everyone to enjoy

Taking a trip to the beatport store this week - any suggestions? I'll post the tracks I bought on here after I spend all my hard-earned taxpayer-provided dollars on them.

At present it looks like this will include items from this list, which may or may not work because the internet is a crazy place that I can't understand because I am one of the ancients.


Also, please prepare yourself for the upcoming DANCETOBERFEST at my place, Saturday October 8th. More details to come as soon as I get a chance to photoshop a picture of Jaypop into a flyer.


[ed: u forgot ur flyer, DJFP! fixed that 4 u]

DUBBLE UPDATE: SPENT ALL MY MONEYS. GOT SOME COOL TRACKS. WILL SPIN THEM NEXT SATURDAY

PonPonPon De Floor

I'm just going to leave this right here.

Like bmore club on valium

THE HELENATOR was excited about this. She's often excited about things. So I had my arm twisted into writing a review for Bird Peterson's most recent (is it even? not sure, don't care) mixtape. Usually I love the shit outta some Bird Peterson. But this one has me a little less than excited. It's bmore club (WHICH I LOVE BEYOND ALL ELSE IN THIS WORLD), but he made it weird, and took away its teeth. No more obnoxious claps, snares, or even laser beams. Gone. Little did he know that THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT AWESOME, THOSE ARE THE GOOD PARTS OF MY BMORE CLUB. Shit man, could he fuck with DC's bullshit gogo scene instead? Baltimore knows what it's doing, let well enough alone. I guess there's other tracks that are just ridic without being bmore club, and some of those have been remixed in a way that makes them electronicky and less obnoxious, but really I'm not impressed. Maybe with the bass turned way up it's a different experience but at present I am only disappoint. Hot Jams Forever by Bird Peterson

hunting deadmice

I got suckered into going to see Deadmau5 again at the Silver Spring Fillmore on Wednesday. Originally I didn't want to go because of the price, but a coworker convinced me to buy an extra ticket or two, wait for it to sell out, and then dump my tickets at a higher price. $75 for one ticket would mean I'd get to see Deadmau5 again for $25! Two and I'd go for free! Great plan! Until the show didn't sell out! And I had to sell my other ticket under face! HOORAY

Now onto the review of both the Mau5 and the venue. This was a very different experience than Virgin Freefest. Night. And. Day. There is a lot to talk about so let's do this in OFFICIAL TSSHOW BULLET POINT STYLE:

• The Fillmore is setup like the 930 Club but a little smaller. And the balcony is off limits except for people who pay ridiculous amounts of money. That is, not us.


• They really need to get on with pushing those firecodes to the max/ignoring them entirely. 1500 is max capacity and I had room to dance. There was a ridiculous and totally unacceptable lack of shit-losing and crushing and violation of personal space and most of all, dancing like mad. WTFFFFF YOU GUYS?


• Sofi was there! It was a fabulous surprise! Her leotard was AMAZING. Want.
  
  Here, listen to this:
  Deadmau5- SOFI Needs A Ladder by weplayhau5
  
  
• One gigantic huge mega awful downside, and I never, ever thought I would say this: there was too much bass, and it sounded fucking terrible. And I was back-mid center, ideal listening zone! It just pounded away, totally drowning out the mids. I actually had a huge problem telling what song was playing! WTFFFFF YOU GUYS?


• The mau5 ended his set with the most incredible version of Strobe I've ever heard. 15 minutes of awe-inducing beats. Perfect way to end.


• I ran into an elementary school crush and it was weird?
  
  

Takeaways: Deadmau5, as usual, killed it. Sofi was fantastic. It didn't even occur to me that the crowds for the music I like are getting YOUNGER AND YOUNGER while I get OLDER AND OLDER. There was an appalling lack of enthusiasm from 1/2 of the crowd. WTFFFFF YOU GUYS? I'm fairly dubious about going back to the Fillmore for a dance show, both for the crowd and for the unforgiveable bass problem. That said, having another venue for concerts in the DC area is always a plus, so I still might consider giving it another shot. Maybe?

K cool. NEXT